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Saturday, January 16, 2010

Side Sitters: A Troubling Problem Among Teens


This just in: "Side sitters," as called in the biz, are f-ing gross (keeping it PG). So here is how it all transpired; I'm in the beloved EC cafe just minding my own business. I grabbed me a double cheese and headed to the tables. Then it happened. What, you ask? Well as my eyes ever so innocently gazed over the cafeteria to figure out my surroundings, and scope out potential shorites, I saw it. "Side sitters". You're probably asking yourself 'what the hell are side sitters and why would it invoke such emotion in a man, that he would literally vomit all over his perfectly cooked meal.' This autrocity is when two people who are clearly dating decide not to sit across from each other like normal folk, would but sit side by side. WTF!?! Why would this ever occur? If there are any side sitters out there, please fill me in so i can perhaps get a grasp on this whole thing and not cover my dub-cheese in my own bile.

1 comment:

  1. This is the best article ever and I completely agree.

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